Engulf

Exhilarating world, incendiary to the sterile, stale state of stability. Technicolor movie hues bled into one another. Uncontainable euphoria gripped me. Fearful of an explosion that could pull everyone into my black hole, a rampant tempest of elation. Unstoppable, but no one had to commend me. My intellect, humor, creativity, and brilliance were unmeasurable and brighter than the sun. I fooled myself into believing I was a creative genius. I was on top of the world. Endless nights spilled into notebook after notebook of pointless knowledge. Obsessed with lexicon and language, literature from days of old was both alluring and horrifying.

However, my grandiosity flourished into a menacing and deadly, exhilarating, technicolor world, animated into a frightful hallucination of Lucifer from Dante’s Inferno. Obsessively, literature of old came to life in my new world, foolishly thinking it a world of my own design and control. My feet suddenly felt every texture in the carpet that was then soaked in blood. Lucifer’s breath was against my neck and upper back. It was warm and moist. Then it rose over my ear and above my head, his cruel figure menacing over me. 

I didn’t realize this reality was all created in my demented mind, fabricating a new frightening world of confusion, isolation, misunderstanding and loss of control. As quick as the hallucination consumed me, suicide gripped my thoughts. Truly, this was the only way out of the twisted, tempestuous labyrinth constructed inside my brain. Medication crushed this technicolor world, and Lucifer retreated. The blood sponged out of the carpet. My shoes returned to my feet. My heartbreak was calmed. Forcibly, I succumbed to the craving of the sterile, stale state of stability.